Adam? Yes, Matty.

So I became a weekend fixture in the Watkins household. Matty warmed up to me more and more, and lately we had taken to wrestling and rough-housing on the family room carpet with only one table lamp as a casualty, and even that I was able to repair quite handily, if you ask me.

All of this touching was great fun for me, and Matty seemed not to mind my hands roaming his body, though except for one or two very surreptitious brushes I avoided his little jewels. The butt, the thighs, the chest -- even under the shirt -- were fair game, apparently, because not only was there not a peep of protest, but no blocking of such moves with his hands or legs.

Susan and I were getting along famously, and I wasn't having any trouble with boyish intrusions into my mind during our adult playtime. Basically, every weekend I spent forty-eight hours awash in sexual feelings, which I quite enjoyed discharging with Susan at least once, and usually twice. It was one of the happiest times of my life, and also the period when I first told Susan I loved her, and she immediately and enthusiastically said it back.

Then one Friday evening when I arrived at the house Susan met me at the door and blocked my entrance with her hand, ushering me back out onto the porch with a finger to her lips, a quiet, "Shhh," and a glance back inside before silently closing the door.

"Matty doesn't know you're here yet," she said, "I know as soon as he does he'll be all over you, but first we need to talk."

I must have had a huge "Uh-oh" look on my face because she broke into a giggle and wrapped me in an embrace. "No, no, it's nothing bad," she said. "Don't worry, it's not that kind of `we need to talk.'"

"Then what's with all the secrecy?" I said.

"It's actually a good thing," she said, "except it raises some issues, and I need your advice."

I knew it must be serious, because in the four months we had dated she had never once asked for advice or counsel of any kind, and I had never offered any. Susan was perhaps the smartest, most capable, most competent-with-a-capital-C woman I had ever met, and she needed advice from the likes of me like a duck needs a raincoat.

"I've been offered a promotion at work," she said, "and I really want it."

"Fantastic!" I said, too loudly, and she shushed me again.

"I would be the Supervising Nurse of the Emergency Department," she said. "I would assign nurses to cases as they came in, allocate treatment rooms, coordinate with other departments of the hospital, all that good stuff. Basically I'd run the day-to-day operation of the ER.

"Unofficially I'd even assign doctors to their cases, but if they didn't want to do what I told them they wouldn't have to. Really I wouldn't have very much actual power, except over the nurses. On everything else I could be overruled by pretty much anyone except the janitor."

"It still sounds like a great step up for you," I said.

"It comes with a title and a raise -- a pretty good one at that," she said, "and it puts me in line for future promotions and raises."

"Sounds like a no-brainer to me," I said. "Where does my advice come in?"

Susan gave me a wry smile. "When you're a single mother," she said, "every decision is about child care. This position is on the evening shift, four to midnight. And as Supervisor, my shift would be more like three to one in the morning."

"Oh shit!" I said. "What do you do with Matty?"

"Precisely," she sighed.

I'm a bit embarrassed to admit that even though I'd been around for four months I didn't have a solid grasp on what she currently did with Matty, child-care wise. I was only there on weekends and Susan was always home with Matty unless we went out on a date, when Gina or some other babysitter filled in. I never gave much thought to what happened the rest of the week when I wasn't around, but obviously Susan had to cover all of her working hours. The kid was smart and self-reliant, but he was still only ten and couldn't be left alone.

"Matty starts school in one week and the job starts in two," she said. "I have to give them my answer Monday or they'll pull the offer and go with number two. I have this weekend to figure it out. Start advising!"

"Well, obviously you have to take the job," I said. "Yes, you're a mom and it's all about your kid, but you'd regret it forever if you passed on this offer."

"Yeah, but he's only a kid for such a short time!" she said. "If I miss out on his childhood I'll regret that forever, too!"

"Child care is really expensive, especially at night. You can't have teenage girls staying here until one in the morning five nights a week, so you'd need, like, a real adult nanny."

"Matty already spends way too much time in child care," Susan said. "It can't be as good for him as being home with someone who cares about him."

We fell silent, Susan looking sad, me thinking furiously. I couldn't stand the thought of Susan and Matty being torn apart. When the idea came to me it seemed obvious.

"I'll move in full time!" I said. "I'll be the child care, and Matty will have someone who cares for him and won't let him forget what his mother looks like."

"Really, Adam?" she said, taking my hands in both of hers. "Are you sure? It's a huge commitment, and it's not really your responsibility."

"I want it to be my responsibility," I said. "I love you, and I want to be here for you, and I want to love Matty and I want him to love me."

She smiled at me and said, "What do you mean, you want to love Matty? Like that's not already a done deal."

"What do you mean?" I asked innocently.

"Oh please," she said. "You've been nuts about that kid practically since day one."

I looked sheepish. "Is it that obvious?" I hoped my other feelings for him weren't so apparent.

"Yes, and you know what? I think he's pretty nuts about you, too."

"What?" I said incredulously. "I guess he's coming around to like me well enough..."

Susan looked at me sardonically and said, "Don't forget, I hear how he talks about you when you're not here, and how you talk about him. Plus I have eyes in my head and I see how the two of you are together. Sometimes I feel like I'm the third wheel!"

I hugged her close and kissed her. I said, "You're the reason I'm here in the first place. But I do admit, Matty is beautiful icing on a delicious cake." We went inside and told Matty that I was moving in, and he whooped and ran to us in joy.

The next week was a whirl. I took two days off of work and since Matty was still in his last week of summer vacation he came along to my condo to help me pack. On the first trip he was so enamored of the complex's indoor-outdoor pool that I agreed to an hour of swimming when we came back in the afternoon for a second load.

He brought his suit and we changed together in my bedroom, and I realized that, though I had seen him nude many times now, this would be the first time he saw me. I watched his eyes as my underwear came down and off, and sure enough he was looking intently. I decided to give him a good show, and so I pretended there was a loose thread on my trunks and padded around the bedroom naked, finding a scissors and trimming it off. His eyes never left me, and I hoped he liked what he saw.

We had such a great time in the pool, and his slick young body felt so good to my touch, that I lost track of time and the promised hour turned into two. Pools are easy places to sneak "accidental" gropes, and so for the first time I actually touched his little equipment, albeit through a swim suit, and it thrilled me to no end. I knew what I'd be fantasizing about when I got my next chance to masturbate.

When I finally had to play bad cop and force us out of the pool, Matty begged for five more minutes but not very vigorously, and was grinning that beautiful grin and chattering happily as we rode the elevator back up to my floor, wrapped in towels and dripping. The second I got the door unlocked Matty ran ahead to the master bathroom and tore off his suit, hurrying to get to the toilet just before a torrent of pee burst forth and splashed loudly into the water.

"Barely made it!" he said as I came in behind him, watching in the mirror as the urine jetted out of his pretty little dick.

"Thank you for not peeing in the pool," I said, and he laughed. I stepped over to the shower and opened the big glass door, reaching in to turn the water on. "We should wash off the chlorine before we get dressed."

"OK," Matty said as he flushed the toilet.

I verified that he was looking, then peeled off my swim trunks. My cock was, shall we say "fuller" than before, and as expected his eyes came right to it. I allowed a long look, then said, "You go ahead, Matty. I can wait."

I happily watched Matty rinse himself off, turning one way then the other, almost like a runway model making sure the audience could see from every angle. I thought for a moment that his cock was also a little fuller than usual, but it could have been wishful thinking.

I pulled out a fresh towel and offered it to him. He stepped out of the shower but didn't reach for the towel, instead turning his back to me in a posture that seemed like anticipation. I suddenly realized what I was expected to do, and so I wrapped the towel around him and began to gently pat him dry. It was wonderful fun, but when I felt my dick begin to inflate I decided I'd better pull the plug.

"Dry your back well, Matty," I said, stepping into the shower. "I've noticed you sometimes leave it a little wet after your bath at home."

I rinsed and dried quickly, following his beautiful naked form back into the bedroom. It was a shame when he was covered up again with clothing, and I pictured him, Susan and me luxuriating in the sand at some high-class nude beach.

The first evening of Susan's new job was the first time I picked Matty up from the Park District program he went to after school, the first time I cooked him his dinner, and the first time he and I would spend the evening together without his Mom. She called to talk to him, twice, but her job was demanding and she couldn't talk for long.

Matty was a trouper and assured Susan he was OK and that she shouldn't worry, and in fact he did seem to be OK while still missing his Mom a little. It was only day one and it still felt like an adventure, two guys having a boys' night, and a person can get through anything for one night. Still, he seemed to me just a tad clingy, and he kept himself in the same room as me from the minute I brought him home until bedtime.

This was certainly no negative in my eyes. We had a great time together cooking, eating, cleaning up, taking his bath (which, yes, I assisted with gentle back-washing) putting on PJs, watching TV and finally going up to bed at nine pm.

He sat squarely on my lap for the entire hour of television, the first time he'd done that, and leaned back against my chest totally relaxed as I affectionately stroked and petted his bare thigh below the shorty pajamas. Though of course it was highly erotic for me I didn't even get a hard-on, just drank in the intoxicating scent of his clean hair and reveled in his perfection.

When I finally laid him in his bed and pulled up the covers I bent down near his face and softly said, "Well, we made it through the first night, didn't we?" My hand was on his narrow chest and I didn't want to break the contact. He looked up into my eyes and I saw great affection there, and it made my heart glad. I felt his chest rising and falling and his little heart beating strong and steady. When I began to pull away he put his hand on top of mine and held it to his chest.

"My Mom always kisses me goodnight," he said, so softly it was nearly a whisper, and he seemed about six years old instead of ten.

I smiled at him and felt more kindness than I'd ever felt for anybody in my life. I bent and kissed him softly on the forehead. It was the first time I had ever kissed him, and it was sweet rather than sexy. He continued to hold my hand to his chest.

"You know how my Mom does it," he said, and I understood.

I bent again and kissed him fully on the lips, and he completely accepted it. Unlike his Mom I held it, one-one-thousand, two-one-thousand, and when I broke the kiss and pulled back he wore a happy smile and his chest rose and fell more heavily. Still he held my hand to his chest, and I bent again and kissed those sensual young lips and this time he kissed back, one-one-thousand, two-one-thousand, three-one-thousand, four-one-thousand. I pulled back and gazed into his amazing, bright-shining green eyes and I saw total acceptance.

"I love you, Matty," I said.

His smile spread even wider. "I love you, too, Adam," he said, and just like that it was declared and committed, both of us understanding completely. I was deeply in love with two people, and happier than I'd ever been.

I went back downstairs and turned on the TV, but after several minutes I realized that I had no idea what I was watching, and I clicked off the set. I thought of our kiss, and the smell of him and the feel of him sitting on my lap, and his soft smooth skin as I washed him in the tub and caressed his thigh, and the sweet little dick and balls I had fondled ever so briefly in the pool, and my cock roared to full erection, so hard it hurt, and I had to reach into my pants to straighten it.

Once I touched it there was no turning back and I tore my pants open and down, yanking my shirt up to my armpits, and grabbing my cock in the expert way I had practiced so many times, hundreds of times since I was even younger than Matty. And then the fantasy came, of the sweet boy I had wanted so badly for all these months and who now, finally, loved me, and who I knew, just knew, would give himself to me without hesitation if I asked him to.

My hand flew up and down, and I could no longer tell where the physical sensations ended and my fantasy began. In my mind I was deeply kissing my wonderful, loving boy, and he was kissing back with a passion and intensity that transported me directly into his heart and mind, if that makes any sense at all.

And then I was kissing down his soft naked body, the pajamas having magically disappeared, and down his slim, heaving chest, between small, sharply erect nipples and across his gossamer soft belly into the rose-white triangle of his pubes, closer and closer to the steel-hard, thumb-thick three inches that quaked and pounded and begged for my attention. And then I engulfed it, its scorching heat searing into my brain even as the silky softness of his pristine ball sack cradled my chin.

My stomach clenched and I felt the familiar rush of lava from deep in my core, rumbling up my shaft and bursting forth like fireworks. The first jet splashed against my cheek, hot and thick, followed one second later by another shot that coated my chest between my erect nipples, and then yet a third blast that gushed out onto my stomach and filled my navel. There were more convulsions and contractions, but only a little more fluid as I heaved and gasped to the end of my orgasm.

In a way it was sad to finally cum because it dashed away the sweet vision I had been having of my lovely Matty, but then that was the nature of masturbation, wasn't it? I lay there panting, floating back down from miles above, contemplating my intense new love.

Having not planned this interlude I had nothing with which to clean up, and so I carefully extricated myself from the couch, trying not to drip on the upholstery. I must have looked comical trying to get to the powder room with my pants around my ankles, my shirt tail held in my mouth to keep it out of the jizz, and my hands vainly trying to contain the rivulets that relentlessly followed the pull of gravity. I was glad no one was there to see it.

After washing up in the powder room I went upstairs and changed into my own summer sleeping attire of gray gym shorts and nothing else. I couldn't get my mind off of Matty, and so I slipped quietly into his room and watched him in beatific sleep. My heart swelled with love for this boy, maybe more so than for Susan, and far more than for anyone else I'd ever thought I loved. I couldn't bring myself to leave, and finally I pulled up the chair from Matty's homework desk, and even though it was much too small for my adult ass I sat on it anyway and resumed gazing upon him.

I was still there when I heard the garage door rolling up as Susan arrived home from work, and I slipped back out of Matty's room and into our bedroom, where I messed up the bedclothes so it would look like I had been sleeping.

I quietly went downstairs and met her in the kitchen, where the microwave oven informed me that it was a quarter after one. "Hey," I said softly. "So how's the queen of the Emergency Room?"

She smiled and came into my arms. "Hardly," she said. "It's a lot of fucking work, but satisfying." She went on to relate a number of anecdotes, from grateful patients and relatives to asshole doctors to nurses in her charge both sweet and bitchy, as well as a rather lengthy and detailed description of the varied and unusual objects humans can get up their asses if they are sufficiently motivated; all this while she ate leftovers from dinner and drank a light beer.

"So how was Matty?" she finally asked, and I got the sense that she had been giving me time to bring something up if I needed to.

"Fantastic," I said, absolutely meaning it. "He missed you, of course, and was a little needy at times because you weren't here, but we had a great time and, I think, really bonded."

She smiled in genuine pleasure. "I told you he liked you," she said. "Hell, he told you he liked you."

"I kissed him goodnight," I blurted, not exactly sure why. "First time for that," I continued, as some kind of explanation for why I had mentioned it. In reality I knew it was because I needed to tell someone about this wonderful new feeling in my heart. I wanted to shout from the rooftops that Matty and I were in love, but this tiny exclamation would have to do.

"How did he react?" she asked, but there was no trace of suspicion. It would be a good thing for a potential step-Dad to be affectionate with a young boy, wouldn't it? I didn't tell her about using the L-word.

"He smiled," I said.

Susan grinned. "I said that you were nuts about him, didn't I?"

"Yep," I said. "I guess you knew it before I did."

"Damn right," she said, and toasted me with the beer bottle before taking a swig.

We slipped into bed at one-forty-five, and I think she was asleep by one-forty-six. I guessed the job was harder than she anticipated, but I also knew she would figure it all out in record time.

Her alarm woke us at six, and she pushed my groggy self back down to the mattress and jumped up with far more energy than anyone should have on four hours of sleep.

"This is my time with Matty," she said. "You sleep another half-hour and then you can drive him to school."

When I came downstairs showered and dressed for work, Susan and Matty were eating cereal and laughing about God-knows-what. I got a heartfelt Good Morning from Matty, a peck on the cheek from Susan, and breakfast from Battle Creek, Michigan. Matty's school started at eight-thirty, and I had arranged my day to begin at nine, so we each kissed Susan goodbye and drove off in my car.

I asked him how he slept and he gave the usual kid response of "Fine," but then he added, "I couldn't stop thinking about when you kissed me."

I studied him carefully for any sign of regret. "What do you think about that?" I asked, ready to backpedal like mad if he was upset, but instead he smiled in the way of someone sharing a secret.

"It was the best goodnight kiss ever!" he said. "I like when my Mom kisses me goodnight, but wow! I never had a kiss like that before."

"I liked it, too," I said. We rode a minute just smiling at each other.

"Adam?" he asked.

"Yes, Matty."

"Are you going to be my Dad?"

My grin faded. I gathered my thoughts for what seemed like ages.

"I don't know," I finally said. "It's not just up to me, you know. Your Mom has a say in the decision, too."

"But you want to be my Dad, don't you?" he asked expectantly.

"Yes, Matty, that would be wonderful," I said. "But I can't promise it."

"I sure hope so," Matty said as we pulled into the circle drive in front of his school. He unbuckled his seat belt and leaned over to give me an unexpected, quick kiss on the cheek. As he scooted out of the car he looked back with a devilish smile and said, "We'll save the really good kisses for home."

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Next time:

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