Date: Mon, 19 Apr 2010 12:44:35 -0700 (PDT) From: D One Subject: Difference The alarm turned on the radio blaring the rock so loud he could hear his mother calling from downstairs. A quick slap turned it off in response. He lay there for a brief time, looking out the window. The sky was just becoming light. The sunrises were getting earlier and earlier as spring took over the cold and stormy winter's hold. Sammy stretched his neck muscles and legs before kicking back the covers and sheets that had warmed him the night long. It was a typical Monday morning with discarded clothing on the floor, an empty bathroom awaiting him and the Corolla waiting to take him to classes. But it wasn't a normal Monday at all. In fact he felt different. His stomach didn't twinge as it usually did when he thought about the waster weekend. His usual erection wasn't rock hard painful, but half hard and still beckoned his hand. But that morning he pet, there was no flesh demands to stroke till he yelped in muffled ecstasy that sometimes prompted his Mother to ask if he was ok. "No need" he said to nobody but himself. Standing in front of the mirror, his naked body looked the same, trim, smooth a bit of pectoral shape and his usually rounded buttocks. But he felt different. There was a feeling inside that he hadn't had before. It was so intense that Sammy's hand moved between his buttocks to make sure something wasn't left there. There was nothing there, though inside he felt as if there were. It had been a weekend of change that told Sammy that he was different and at the same time that he wasn't different at all. Sammy knew he liked guys sexually years before the cap and gown labeled him as ready for the world. He still felt like he was in high school as class after class led him through College. Nobody chided him if he arrived late. And there wasn't anyone yelling about running in the hallways. The girls dressed differently too. Few dressed like they were immitating former American Idol contestants. And as for the guys, they dressed in tee shirts, jeans and flip flops even in the winter. "The more things change the more they stay the same" Fred one of his friends from high school said. It was true. But that Monday morning it wasn't true at all. "Come on, man you know you'll love it" Chippen urged him and Sammy was soon among a crowded large warehouse floor. Color lights flashed and music made his ears vibrate. Beer was served after a shirtless bartender pretended to look at their fake ids. And as the beers were consumed, self conscious feelings disappeared. Sammy was in the crowd enjoying the anonymity of the cover that many boys and men provided. Chippen, Manny and Arnold danced with him. The heat, the music and the feeling that he was where he belonged took away shirts and inhibitions as they moved suggestively. "Hey" an older guy nodded as Sammy leaned against the wall waiting for his turn to rid himself of processed beer. He nodded. "You're cute" the man said making Sammy blushed and wonder how he should respond simultaneously. "Uh thanks, not used to hearing that" he said daring not to look at the guy less his embarassment be obvious. "Is that because you only know blind guys or you don't get out enough?" the man put his hand on Sam's bare shoulder. It gently massaged his skin. "I guess I don't get out. Friends talked me into it tonight" he said. "Well tell them thanks for me" the guys hands became fingers that gently pulled one of Sammy's nipples. He didn't know what to say or do. His cock seemed to expanding in his jeans. "What are you doing later?" the man had moved in front of him now, both his hands resting on Sammy's bare chest. He was tall, black hair, his bare torso revealed his athletic pursuits. He leaned forward to whisper in Sammy's ear. Sammy's breathing got deeper and faster. The things that the guy said in his ear had only been fantasies that enhanced his private masturbating before. "It's time" the last words awoke Sammy from the mental images other words had created. "Your turn" the guy said moving backwards and pointing to the bathroom door. "Oh yea" Sammy said as he moved inside. "I'll be waiting" the guy said. Sammy's cock hardened as he remembered each second of the past Saturday night. He smiled remembering how awkward he had felt. "Where you been?" Chippen "Piss and some guy...." Sammy had to yell over the music. "Go for it" Chippen turned him around. The rest was a blur. He looked around and eyes met the guy. His name was Conrad. "Some call me "Connie" the guy smiled "But I hate that, call me Conrad" they shook hands, shared drinks and kissed. Sammy shuttered. He had never kissed another guy other then when he was five experimenting with a friend. Maybe he knew then he liked it and wanted more even though he didn't know what "more" was at the time. He rode on the back of Conrad's motorcycle. It wasn't the first time nor was it the first time his arms surrounded the man who drove one. But that was an Uncle and a Cousin. It didn't count but it did make his cock hard. Sammy felt guilty about that. They kissed, they got naked, they touched, stroked, sucked and Sammy lay on his belly while Conrad entered him. It seemed to all happen naturally, automatically and any measure of time didn't matter. He awoke intertwined with the naked man actually not that much older then he, Sammy discovered during the breakfast. "Won't you get burnt?" he asked watching a naked Conrad frying eggs and bacon. They ate, talked and kidded each other about things Sammy never talked about out loud, not even to Chippen who became his confidant. "Hey, I'm Chippen. I'm gay too" the boy stuck out his hand to Sammy as he sat on a bench near the college building. He didn't say anything to change the guys greeting. Sammy was happy to make a friend. He shook the hand and began a friendship that enabled him to hear things about gays, love, sex and gay bars. It was Chippen who introduced gay bars to him. It was Chippen who boldly introduced Manny his boyfriend to him. It was Chippen who telephoned him late at night after he and Manny split up. Sammy moved to the shower to prepare for the Monday ahead. He liked the phantom cock feeling. He still had the taste of Conrad's sperm on his tongue and savored it. Usually brushing his teeth and tongue, Sammy stopped at his teeth. He wanted to keep the memory. "Go ahead" Chippen had yelled over the music "You never know when it will happen again and you'll probably never see him again". Sammy had read about gay dating and sex.Gossip, catty comments and rumor stories on various internet sites had made him wary of what might be ahead for him. Still he knew that someday he might meet a guy who he wants to be intimate with who like he, wanted to exchange hand plesasures for what the other offered. He soaped his body wishing it felt like Conrad's hands. He fingered inside his anus wishing it would feel like that first time he was entered let along the two other times that followed throughout Sunday. His nipples. stimulated by thoughts, felt good in his soapy fingers but not as startling as when he leaned against the wall as Conrad boldly assaulted them. "What are you doing after breakfast?" Conrad asked as he sat on the stool next to Sammy. Sammy didn't know whether to be polite or honest. "nothing planned" "Your taste ok?" Conrad smiled as he shoveled in another bite. "Yea but not as good as your sausage" Sammy had decided. "That's bacon not sausage" Conrad looked confused but before his words ended, Sammy had knelt in front of the stool and took the man's cock in his mouth gain until it filled him with morning sperm. "Nice" Sammy smacked his lips several times. "Gawd that was hot" Conrad seemed like the recipient now instead of the one who had introduced sex to the virgin young man he met in the danceclub the night before. "I got more" he said and it was Sammy who led him back to the bedroom. The kisses were less urgent, the touching slower but their cocks were just as hard and Sammy lay on his back wanting to watch the man who had broken him into the world he hoped for. He dried himself off and ran to his car grabbing a piece of toast ignoring his mother's cry to sit and eat. Class after class went by. Lunch with Chippen was filled with him trying not to answer all of his friends questions, but hinting that it was a night and day of unbridled sex. "I just didn't want to dress and leave" Sammy sighed. Chippen offered some catty remarks which he ignored. And the day ended much like anyday. Sammy knew that nothing had really changed. He was the same, classes were the same, Chippen was the same, his mother was the same. The walk to his car from lecture hall bldg was the same. But seeing Conrad waiting there, leaning against his motorcycle told Sammy was wrong. There was a difference.